Transcript Human Communication in Society by Jess alberts, nakayama

HUMAN COMMUNICATION
IN SOCIETY
BY JESS K. ALBERTS, THOMAS K.
NAKAYAMA, AND JUDITH N. MARTIN
Prepared by Darrell G. Mullins
Salisbury University
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CHAPTER 8:
COMMUNICATING IN CLOSE
RELATIONSHIPS
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Overview of Themes
 Close Relationships and the Individual
 Models of Relationship Development
 Communicating in Friendships and
Romantic Relationships
 The Individual, Relationship
Communication, and Society
 Ethics and Close Relationships
 Improving Your Conflict Skills
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Close Relationships
and the Individual
iStockphoto/DanielBendjy
“Close relationships can be a source of
happiness, comfort, and even distress.”
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The Importance of
Close Relationships
 Improve Psychological Well Being
 Improve Physical Health
Royalty FreeThomas Northcut/Lifesize/Getty Images
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What Are Close Relationships?
 Frequency, Intensity, and Diversity of
Contact
 Relationships in Which People See Each
Other as Unique and Irreplaceable
 Communication Marked by High
Disclosure and Openness
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Influences on
Relationship Development
 Proximity
 Physical Closeness
 Electronic Closeness
 Attractiveness
 Physical Attractiveness
 The Matching Hypothesis
 Personality
 Similarity
 Values and Interests
 Uncertainty Reduction Theory
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Models of Relationship Development
“Because relationship
Index Open/PhotosToGo
development is an important
aspect of life and because
sometimes the process goes
awry…scholars have devoted
considerable effort toward
creating models to explain it.”
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Stage Models of Relationship
Development:
Social Penetration Theory
 Central Concept: Level of Self-Disclosure
 Breadth vs. Depth
 Stages
 Orientation
 Exploratory Affective Exchange
 Affective Exchange
 Stable Exchange
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Stage Models-The
Knapp/Vangelisti Model
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Relational Trajectory Models:
The Turning Point Model
 A bi-directional model
 Multiple paths throughout relationship
development
 Significant events, “turning points,” in the
relationship propel the relationship in one
direction or the other
 See types of turning points on p. 200
 Turning points apply to friendships, too
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Relational Trajectory Models:
Relational Dialectics
 Dialectic Defined: Competing Tensions
 Types of Dialectical Tensions
 autonomy/connection
 expressiveness/privacy
 change/predictability
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Communicating in Friendships and
Romantic Relationships
“…friendships can differ
markedly from
romances in how much
we reveal, especially in
the early stages.”
Index Open/PhotosToGo
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Initiating Relationships
Romantic Relationships
 Flirting
 Gender Differences
 Communication and Dating
Friendships




Conversational Initiation Skills Vital
Open With a Non-threatening Comment
Ask Broad, Open-Ended Questions
Listen Attentively
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Maintaining Relationships
Romantic Relationships
Friendships
 Positivity
 Conversation
 Openness
 Similar Communication
Skills
 Assurances
 Social Networks
 Assurances
 Sharing Tasks
 Positivity
 Joint Activities
 Open Discussion
 Mediated Communication
 Listening
 Avoidance/Antisocial
 Sharing Time
 Humor
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Couples’ Maintenance Behaviors
Adapted from: Stafford, L. (2003). Maintaining romantic relationships: Summary and analysis of one research program. In D. Canary & M. Dainton
(Eds.), Maintaining relationships through communication (pp. 51–78). Mahwah, NJ: Erlbaum.
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Ending Relationships
 Difficulties in Understanding Relationship
Termination
 Unwillingness to Discuss
 Identifying When Termination Begins
 Termination Trajectories
 Sudden Death
 Passing Away
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Why Relationships End
Romantic Relationships
 Lack of Autonomy
 Lack of Similarity
 Lack of




Supportiveness
Infidelity
Inequity
Absence of Romance
“Fatal Attractions”
Friendships
 Minimal Pressure to







Maintain
Lack of Awareness
Lack of Proximity
Decreased Affection
Lack of Communication
Skills
Rule-Breaking
Deception
Boredom
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Relationship Termination Strategies
Romantic Relationships
 Negative Identity
Management
 De-escalation
 Justification
 Behavioral
De-escalation
Friendships
 Withdrawal/Avoidance
 Third-Party Message
 Positive Tone
 Openness
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Confronting Relationship
Challenges
 Aversive Communication Behaviors
 Frequency
 Examples: Nagging, Criticizing, Teasing
 Deception
 Frequency
 The Impact of the Truth Bias
 Particularly Devastating in Friendships
 Jealousy
 Combination of Emotions
 Result of Perceived Threat to Relationship
 Gender Differences
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Confronting Relational Challenges,
Continued
 Relational Aggression
 Frequency
 Communication Patterns in Abusive Romantic
Relationships
 Communication Patterns in Abusive
Friendship Relationships
 Sexual Coercion
 Date Rape vs. Sexual Coercion
 Contributors to Sexual Coercion
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Improving Your Conflict Skills
“In the midst of a heated conflict, or if confronted by an
enraged person, often the best approach you can take
is to try to defuse the interaction.”
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Conflict De-Escalation Strategies
 De-escalate Your Own Anger
 Listening To Understand
 Empathizing
 Taking Time Out
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The Individual, Relationship
Communication, and Society
“Many people think that relationships are an
individual matter… However, society wields
strong influences on our choices and
behavior.”
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Society, Power, Courtship, and
Marriage
 Society sets norms for mate selection and
behavior—high homogeneity.
 Society sets norms for communication
behavior.
 Social norms inhibit some groups from
expressing their relationships.
 Businesses set policies that affect employees’
relationships.
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Society, Power, and Friendship
 Individuals face pressure from social
groups regarding friendship choices.
 Norms/beliefs about cross-sex friendships
affect their enactment.
 Society has norms about the relative role
of friends in our lives.
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Ethics and Close Relationships
“If you communicate unethically with
your friends, family, and romantic
partner, the consequences may be
severe.”
Tara Moore / Stone / Getty Images
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Some Guidelines
 Authentic Communication
 Confront Important Issues
 Take Responsibility
 Allow Others to Speak From Their Own
Positions and Experiences
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